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News India in year 2040

News in The Sunday Times in year 2040

A notice board in BJP conference room reads:  “Please keep mobiles in MANMOHAN SINGH mode”

Kasab dies in jail at 70 due to high cholestrol (too much biriyani).

The PM Rahul said Opposition comments on the expenditure on Kasab is
unwarranted. Govt has spent only Rs 185 crores so far. Opposition says ministers expenses to visit  Kasab to check his well being are not included.

Kasab family thanks Indian Govt. as Kasab never had biriyani in his younger days in Pakistan.

Farmers suicide reaches 50000, due to hunger. Farmer family complains, no minister has  visited them.

Pawar family owns half the world and also controls, the Russian and Japanese mafia.

Golmaal 27 has been released. Tushar Kapoor, still can’t speak or act.

A. Raja’s grandson arrested for G-16 scam.

Girl in Delhi walks 25 feet safely,without getting raped.

Lakshadeep “cats ” to join as the 63rd team in IPL.

No politicians in cricket board, because the board is bank corrupt.

Pawar’s grandson who had become a malayalee in 2011 resigns from the Trustee post of Padmanabha Swamy temple, says there is nothing more to loot.

Pakistan says Tamil Nadu was a part of Pakistan. PM  Rahul says the issue can be resolved by talks. A special committee has been formed headed by Digvijay Singh for the talks.

Teacher ” where is the CAPITAL OF INDIA?”.  Student ” in Switzerland”

Many American and Western university girls are wooing Indian politician sons. Stanford and Hayward say that is the best job they can get.

Kasab letter found written to Osama Bin Laden in 2010. You should have hidden in India. This is the most safest place to hide. They never hang us and give us the best protection and nice biryanis unlike in Pakistan.

Dig Vijay Singh’s grandson says,”the hand in the Congress flag is also RSS hand”.

Censor Board reconstituted to 3467 members. All members of Lok Sabha and Rajya Sabha, 200 politicans, 5 from OBC,  5 from OC, 5 from Shia and Sunni each, 5 from Christians, 5 from Police. 5 each from the 200 new acts that govt. has introduced, whenever they don’t want to take action, 5 from Adivasis  etc.

BJP protests saying, minority Hindus have no say in Censor Board.

Dig Vijay Singh says Rajiv Baba son of Rahul Gandhi, who is 18, is  ready to become next Prime Minister.

Constitution amended. Now foreigners can become PM.

Because of so many acts and no law, one lawyer is allowed to take only one case during his life time. Each case will be attended by one judge only. If the judge dies during the 40 years of the case, his son will automatically become a judge and will continue the case. This is because of the new Act Chidambaram had brought in saying, no case can be concluded before 50 years.

Hindu Minority Commission has been formed. The Muslim Law Board and Christian
Missionary registers strong protest on this. They say that this is communalism.

Manmohan Singh award for the dumb has been declared.

Politicians have been  exempted from Income tax. Finance Minister says, it is difficult to assess because most of the income is in cash.

PM says scams which are 7 years old should not come under the Indian law. He said this when the Telgi Stamp paper scam and Hassan Ali hawala cases came up for hearing. He also added that we should learn from the TV channels. They never talk about old scams and always bring new scams.

Fortune 500 declares : “All the 500 richest men in the world are from India”

India’s BPL (below poverty line) has gone to 90%. All money is  with politicians only.

Pawar, Karunanidhi family, Jagan Yesu Samuel (he is the son of Yesu Samuel
Rajasekhar Reddy, former CM of Andhra) are biggest money lenders to America.

 

(contributed by: Mohan Rao on 06.08.2011)

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